Mistress had been starting to feel a bit burnt-out with sessions lately. Well no, not so much with sessions per say; but with some of the asshats that contact me pretending
to be interested in sessioning. It's among the reasons you'll get an attitude when you contact me via phone. My ads all state to contact me via email, firstname.lastname@example.org
. I include my phone number at all, for that rare, geniune sub who can not place calls from his home for whatever reason. At least 90% of those who call instead of emailing, are not that sub. They are time wasters at best, and jerks more often. I run an ad on eros.com. It states quite clearly what is offered. It should be assumed if it's a common fetish, and NOT listed; it's not available. For example, goldens. Mistress realizes that they are very popular among some subs, but I just can not perform on demand like that, and I do not offer them.If I did, I would obviously include them in my ad. Now right next to my ad, are ads from several beautiful, skilled & versatile Mistresses who state quite clearly that they do offer goldens, or even Roman showers. Call them. I know them by reputation only, but their reputations are outstanding, and if they offer what you want of course that's who you should call. Instead, while busy enjoying my day I will get a heavy breathing caller, asking in gory, graphic detail if I will make an exception and give him a golden or roman shower. I have a theory. I think these time wasters are scoping the ads specifically to find what isn't
offered, calling with their pathetic little ****s in their hands and hoping I will berate them, free-of-charge by phone. Now of course, a polite, non-invasive, email asking if I offer something that isn't mentioned is a different matter entirely. Being the flighty creature I am, perhaps it's something I haven't tried yet but would be willing to use you as a giunea pig to try out. Or perhaps it's not a common request, but a fave activity of mine. Ad space is expensive, I don't list every little, off-beat, idea I have. The difference is the method and the tone of the question. I read my emails when I choose to, so of course it's not interupting me to send one.
I have had more than the average of these calls lately. I have also had more than the average amount of pretend subs calling or emailing. Setting up a session, but not confirming. Or worse, setting up, confirming and not showing or calling to cancel. Ok, there was only 1 of those recently. But one is way too many. Mistress's time is precious. The hour you booked is actually an hour or more of getting myself prepared, the time preparing my space, the time preparing any specifics you requested, and the time spent confirming your appointment. An hour of sessioning is at least 3 hours with prep and clean-up. The list of things I would rather do, than waste my time, is infinite.
My regular subs, please do not think that any of this rant is directed at you. If I know you already, you are welcome to call to see if I have a last minute cancelation, or even to just say hello. In the professional domination setting, it's difficult to do the follow-up and aftercare a good session should have. I like to hear your feedback from your session. If there is ever a post-session problem, say a bruise that isn't fading or a reaction to my lotions, I want to help you resolve those issues. Mistress does not want to ever invade your vanilla world, so I don't feel it's appropriate for me to call post-session to make those inquiries.
Thankfully, I had the most perfect session yesterday. I swear I was about one jerk away from retiring my flogger. I want to post some of the highlights, so that my subs & new-to-me-subs can see my expectations are not unreasonable and put some of these suggestions into practice. Now Mr.Exhibitionist is a long time friend, and repeating sub. Note that I put friend before sub, it denotes which is more valued by me. I was sent an email on Sunday; a hello, birthday wishes and inquiring about something we had tried to plan recently. Here's an idea, if I have shared info from my vanilla world with you, it's shows I was comfortable in your session, and that I liked you as a person. If you remember to ask me how whatever I shared with you worked itself out, it will impress me. Mistress is as appreciative of being remembered as anyone else. Now Mr.Ex and I chatted for a bit, and after social niceties were out of the way he asked if I had any last minute openings. A time was set, and of course he showed up at the agreed to time. If you will be more than 5 minutes late, a call is appropriate. Let's remember that Mistress is a parent in the real world, worrying is part of my DNA. I do not wish to imagine your bloody, demise in a horrific accident while in route to a session with me. Back to my great session. Mr.Ex was well groomed, smelled fresh and was carrying a gorgeous array of long stem orange roses. He appreciated the smile that was bestowed on him, and told me so. We spent time chatting, he politely told me that something from the last session was too much and asked if I could turn down the intesity of it should I wish to do it again. He updated me about things that had changed since last session that would effect our session. For example, if you suddenly developed an allergy since last session; that's info I need to know. Your safety is my hands, I need the data to make good choices for you. The session continued, and it was fun, intense, and more than enjoyable for me. Mr Ex was exhausted at the end of it, which I will take as proof that he enjoyed his session as much as I did.
Thankfully, most of my sessions go just as nicely. I used Mr Ex as my example, just because it was fresh in my memory. Those little things are all that's needed for a session to go from being good to being great for both of us. Mistress loves what she does. On so many levels being a dominatrix is just a dream career for me. I meet wonderful people. I am expected to indulge myself in all things girly, fun, feminine and beautiful. Pedicures aren't a special treat, they're a work-related expense :) My schedule is as flexiable as I need it to be. I get to act out my own fantasies, fetishes and kinks. And at the risk of exposing how big my ego is, I feel like I help my subs to work through both vanilla & bdsm issues in a safe & nurturing enviroment. I don't want a couple of jerks to change how much I enjoy this. I'm thankful Mr. Exhibitionist's timing was perfect and remind me of all of the positives of being Mistress Cassidy......